Lesson No 45: Stumbling Block or Stepping Stone?

I didn’t purpose to be in the space that I find myself in.  God plucked me from the path that I had set out for myself & set me on an alternative journey. At the start it all appeared somewhat ‘accidental’ but I know now that it was no accident, rather His design, His purpose for my life… 

So now that I am here, these are my confessions…the lessons I am learning about being a woman in business, building an empire, one brick at a time… 

Your emotions can either be a stumbling block – hindering progress towards your goals or a stepping stone – propelling you forwards 

Mucha Mlingo

I have learned that stumbling blocks and stepping stones appear to look the same – how you approach them is the life-changing experience. 

One of the most frequent questions in emotional intelligence coaching is ‘how can I get better at controlling my feelings?’ The language of this question reveals a bias that there are bad emotions requiring control – which means exerting power to subdue.  

“Emotion can lead to our worst decisions or our best ones: The difference is EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE” 

Six Seconds

Emotions are DATA.  The goal is not to ‘control’ them, rather to tune in, and harness & utilise them as stepping stones. 

It’s time to make friends with your emotions. Change your perspective & understand that they are messages from you to you — messages with wisdom. Emotions, even challenging ones like anger, fear and jealousy, are there for a reason!  

Feelings motivate. 

Fear motivates protection

Anger motivates attack

Joy motivates connection

Disgust motivates rejection

Trust motivates stepping forward

Sorrow motivates withdrawing

Surprise motivates stopping to assess

Anticipation motivates looking forward

At the core of emotional intelligence is a choice between consciousness and reactivity.  

Move out of reaction – to pause, evaluate and respond in the best way possible 

Six Seconds

Ask yourself, if this emotion was an ally, trying to help me – what would it be telling me? Instead of “controlling” the emotions, control your behavior (hitting, shouting, hurting, running are all behaviors). 

Emotional Intelligence is being more aware, more intentional & more purposeful. 

At the core, emotional intelligence is something to BE.   

By being more emotionally intelligent, smarter with feelings, you will more accurately recognize emotions in yourself and others and this data will help you make decisions and craft effective solutions to the “life puzzles” you face each day.   

With Love, 
The Queen Of Hearts
Mucha Mlingo 
| Six Seconds EQ Practitioner | Master Trainer & Facilitator | 
| Award Winning International Keynote Speaker | 

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